I bought an orchid plant about 1 1/2 weeks ago to liven up my cubicle at work... and it's been so amazing to watch the progress of its growth. The second night I saw the plant, there was this one flower beginning to peek out of its little bud. I thought, "Cool! A flower that will open in time!"
I come in the next morning and the entire flower had completely *BOOM* opened, its petals expanded and stretched out as if to proudly shout out, "Here I am! I am here! I exist! I love life!" I was surprised, as I didn't realize that flowers open up that fast! So I held my hands up as if in surrender, "You win. Open up! I can't top the strength of you, little flower, though I am probably 50 times your size!" *I laugh* "You win, little flower! Glad to see you eyes are wide and open! Welcome to this fantastic world!" ^_^ And the flower is still standing there proudly next to its brothers and sisters, wide awake and proud to be a part of the family.
And then the next one came... it opened and blossomed. Each the same, but with its own uniqueness. "I am younger than the rest of you," it proclaimed. "For I am here now, the baby of the family." The eldest one of the pack nods, already feeling its wisdom has grown beyond the others. "Yes, yes, little one. You have not faced the tiredness and weariness of how long I have been out here, wide awake, but growing tired of standing with age. Yes, yes, little one. Come out and shine! Bring your refreshing energy of youth and happiness! Welcome to the world."
And just yesterday night, I tapped on a particular bud, still sleeping away in its hiding place. I turned to my co-worker and announced, "I'm waiting for this one. It looks like it'll be next. Yes, this one has potential." We both nod in agreement and expectation. So today I walk into my office, and what do you know? That particular bud is beginning to peek out from its little cocoon. It still hasn't opened to reveal the brilliant colors of its petals... but like a little child, it begins to take its first catious peeks of the world... testing the waters to make sure the temperature is all right. And when the child finally feels satisfied and secure -- it will come out probably by tonight.
As the Bible is long and takes much time to read. Some passages that I found along the way that have inspired me:
"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it." - Matthew 7:13-14
"But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be sons of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked." - Luke 6:35
"Flesh gives birth to flesh, but the Spirit gives birth to the spirit. You should not be surprised at my saying, 'You must be born again.'" John 3:6-7
"Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him." James 1:12
"I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent." Luke 15:7
"I tell you the truth, it is hard for a rich man to enter the kingdom of heaven. Again I tell you, it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God." Matthew 19:23-24
"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak, a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace." - Ecclesiastes 3:1-8
Yes, yesterday was our one year anniversary. It is quite interesting the long road we took to get to where we are today. It all began that July 6, 2002 -- our very first meeting with all the interested girls. hehe. I even remember all those name ideas we came up with. ... so as the summer went on, we worked hard and established ourselves fully that September 25, 2002 at the University of Washington.
It's still crazy we're the first chapter. When I tell other people I'm in Chi Sigma Alpha, they always say, "Oh, we don't have that sorority at our school." And I'm just say: "I know. There's only one chapter thus far -- we're only at UW right now." But we're going to expand, right, Lizzie? >_< We've turned nothing into something -- and it'll just keep on growing into something more.
I'm so proud of that. And I've learned so much from the entire process. I've learned much from the other sisters. I've learned so much about hard-work, endurance, and patience. I had a great time as Interim President this summer. It was like when I was the director for Unleashed. So much responsibility in my own hands -- so many decisions to make, so many things to lead, so many people to care about.
((I can only pray that UCLA will take me into their MBA program in 2 years time. *prays prays*...))
So, Happy 1-Year Anniversary, CHI SIGMA ALPHA. We've come a ways, and we still have a long way to go.
... they only seem to be getting better. It's not the high, it's not the up's and down's...
...it's the calm. It's to feel very collected and cool...
...it's to feel very respectful and very respectable...
...it's to feel very tired but very accomplished...
...it's to know there's much stress ahead but to be excited about it...
I am excited. About my new classes. About graduation. About my uncertain future career. About the Beta class rush and pledgeship. About working part-time. About Thanksgiving and seeing all my old high school friends in Las Vegas. About Unleashed. About building new friendships. About meeting new people. About becoming a better person for myself.
... and I'm ready to face the music. I'm a singer after all. ^_^ I feel the music, and I sing what I feel. But I've always hidden behind the mask that you wear when you stand up on stage. A beautiful red dress flowing in soft waves around the ankles. Your face made-up and the hair pinned up in intricate patterns.
The music starts, the piano is played... and you become another person. You perform gracefully... because it's not me on stage. It's the other.
I'm ready to peel off the mask. Wipe away the streaks of lipstick and mascara. Strip off the dress and throw on a robe. Curl up on the couch with a pint of chocolate ice cream after soaking in a soothing bubble bath. I am relaxed and comfortable. I am happy.
There are so many friends I miss. So far in distance, but close to me in heart. You deal with what you do have close by, but you long to talk to those far away. And you can only wonder how they are, how they're doing. How they've changed. What they've become.
And there you sit, licking off the dripping chocolate from the shining spoon. There you've changed. There you've grown. There you've become. And that is all you truly know.
I had drawn it first. Super Pig. The cape billowing out behind him with the perky smirk of the upturned snout. Leaving behind a cloud of dust from its speedy flight I had thought my pig to be almost perfect. Smoothly he had stolen my notebook out from under my hands. Before I could protest he had picked up his hand and defiantly started defining his own lines along the delicate paper. As the professor's voice brought me back to class, I could only sit there quietly waiting for the return of my notebook. The girl a seat beforeme had turned back and given me 'the glare' quite a couple of times already as if to say "Shut up or I'll tell the teacher on you." We weren't in elementary school anymore. I fumbled my thumbs around, playing with my fingers and smearing the sweat of my sticky palms across the dried skin starting to cake the in-betweens of my fingers. Impatiently I swiftly glanced at the clock. 30 more minutes. I didn't want to look too eager so I only allowed myself a brief glimpse. 28 minutes left. My attention was back to the sweaty dry prunes protruding from my palms. I picked away the carcass of the dead skin. Finally, he gave such a proud smirk and returned my notebook to its place. I stared down at his "perfect pig." No line out of place. No excess marks or gray-black smears that my hands always tended to leave wiped across the image. Everything was to a masterpiece of curve, line, and contour. I've never imagined such perfect cylinders for feet as what was drawn on the paper in front of me. The neatness of the drawing made me ponder if he had the hands of a female. Males aren't supposed to make such neat lines on paper, or are they? Steadily, I lifted a finger to gently trace along the indentations in the paper made by the hard-tip of his writing pencil. He gave a sideways grin of a 3 yr-old and proclaimed to me, "Now that's what I call a Super Pig!" I tensed up from lack of compliments my own drawing had received in comparison to his of all perfection. Then calmed myself and slowly turned to sweetly smile up at him and say, "Yes, I believe that is power pig. Very well drawn indeed." Pleased with himself, his grin widened and he beamed with such pride that I had to quickly turn my head to cover my own mouth in a smile of laughter.
Sometimes I can be so amused by what the earth holds, my environment, the people...
Other times it scares me to death, all the anger and hatred and suffering...
But most times, it's beauty just amazes me, and I am awestruck by what it has to offer. Then you have to ask the question: Why am I so lucky to have been born?
And that's where you have to thank those two special parents who have created you... to give you a chance at life and hope. It's what you do with life that counts... what you and you alone do with it...